And people are okay with that. Lol.
So the folks at Eurogamer can "speed run" the game in 10min. I'd also like to take this time to point out that the actual gamer sensibilities, not even touching on their skill level at large, among the staff at Eurogamer are average-to-below-average, so if you've played your fair share of MGS beforehand, you can accomplish a similar feat. You don't even have to be that good of a speed-runner. You don't have to be a speed-runner in general. Hell, it might even take half that time with a legit speed-runner.
For instance, a "speed-run" of Metroid: Fusion released by some random gamer on GameFAQs internet-eons ago involved him doing such in an hour and a half, with cheats. My cousin got to just under 39min in his best run, with cheats (no shinespark).
Let that sink in for a bit; you have a US$30 game that a legit speed-runner could complete much faster than that average joe's "speed-run." So maybe under 5min. Holy shit. For $30, I can buy Steel Diver: Sub Wars, Shovel Knight, and Bit Trip Runner and still have enough left over for maybe one DLC submarine in Steel Diver.
And people are actively DEFENDING this game!
Do y'all not realize that this is NOT okay? This game is a glorified fucking demo, and people are just gonna let Kojima and his army of Psycho Mantis cutouts fleece them! Fuck, they might as well stuff their Social Security Numbers, along with their debit cards, in their wallets and go to fucking Times Square on a busy tourist day. I'm sure Kojima will force them to pay their own fares and wait for them with his pants unzipped, lube ready. Why-or, better yet, how-can people just defend this game?!
Then they say, "Oh, well that's without the side-questing and stuff." OH MY FUCKING GOD! That only puts into perspective how short this game is! That means that there's barely shit to do besides treat the bitch like a glorified movie! (To Kojima's credit, he intends on doing just that with his ultra-cinematic approach. He's kinda like that one movie nerd friend you have when you go to a new showing; you just want to enjoy the movie, but he won't shut the fuck up about it being "the death spiral of cinema" because of nuances that only nit-picky fucks like himself cares about) So there's-what-3hrs of gameplay (total?) with 10hrs of Snake struggling with his bronchitis in an attempt to convey his inner pain (literally), followed by Big Boss reminiscing on, after killing his mentor, how the wood fire and carpet gave him aesthetic pleasure when they aligned perfectly with Eva's tits? Or maybe Kojima will laugh at how he just bitch-slapped his fanbase with this glorified demo? Maybe he'll toss in some foreshadowing and tutorials for game mechanics that are gonna be in the future release of the actual game for shits and giggles.
So which one of you gobblers bought this shit?
So the folks at Eurogamer can "speed run" the game in 10min. I'd also like to take this time to point out that the actual gamer sensibilities, not even touching on their skill level at large, among the staff at Eurogamer are average-to-below-average, so if you've played your fair share of MGS beforehand, you can accomplish a similar feat. You don't even have to be that good of a speed-runner. You don't have to be a speed-runner in general. Hell, it might even take half that time with a legit speed-runner.
For instance, a "speed-run" of Metroid: Fusion released by some random gamer on GameFAQs internet-eons ago involved him doing such in an hour and a half, with cheats. My cousin got to just under 39min in his best run, with cheats (no shinespark).
Let that sink in for a bit; you have a US$30 game that a legit speed-runner could complete much faster than that average joe's "speed-run." So maybe under 5min. Holy shit. For $30, I can buy Steel Diver: Sub Wars, Shovel Knight, and Bit Trip Runner and still have enough left over for maybe one DLC submarine in Steel Diver.
And people are actively DEFENDING this game!
Do y'all not realize that this is NOT okay? This game is a glorified fucking demo, and people are just gonna let Kojima and his army of Psycho Mantis cutouts fleece them! Fuck, they might as well stuff their Social Security Numbers, along with their debit cards, in their wallets and go to fucking Times Square on a busy tourist day. I'm sure Kojima will force them to pay their own fares and wait for them with his pants unzipped, lube ready. Why-or, better yet, how-can people just defend this game?!
Then they say, "Oh, well that's without the side-questing and stuff." OH MY FUCKING GOD! That only puts into perspective how short this game is! That means that there's barely shit to do besides treat the bitch like a glorified movie! (To Kojima's credit, he intends on doing just that with his ultra-cinematic approach. He's kinda like that one movie nerd friend you have when you go to a new showing; you just want to enjoy the movie, but he won't shut the fuck up about it being "the death spiral of cinema" because of nuances that only nit-picky fucks like himself cares about) So there's-what-3hrs of gameplay (total?) with 10hrs of Snake struggling with his bronchitis in an attempt to convey his inner pain (literally), followed by Big Boss reminiscing on, after killing his mentor, how the wood fire and carpet gave him aesthetic pleasure when they aligned perfectly with Eva's tits? Or maybe Kojima will laugh at how he just bitch-slapped his fanbase with this glorified demo? Maybe he'll toss in some foreshadowing and tutorials for game mechanics that are gonna be in the future release of the actual game for shits and giggles.
So which one of you gobblers bought this shit?